Wine Wednesday: 12 reasons wine is better than a significant other

Whether you’ve had a rough day at work, a stressful week or just need a pick-me-up, there’s one cure for it all: Wine. When your significant other just isn’t cutting it, wine will always come through – and here’s why.

1. Wine knows exactly what you want.

What do you want? Wine. Wine is always the answer. Whether it be a cozy night in with friends, a fancy dinner party or simply binge watching “Friends” on Netflix by yourself on a Tuesday night.

2. Wine fits in virtually everywhere.

There’s no need to keep a watchful eye on wine when they don’t know anyone at a party. Everyone at the party knows wine. Wine will never come up to you halfway through the night complaining that they’re “bored” and “really just want to go home.”

3. Wine has no problem opening up.

Wine never fails to open up to you – no constant poking or nagging necessary.

4. Wine never whines.

While a significant other might disagree with you, complain and whine, you’ll never have this problem with wine. Religion? Politics? Your plans for Friday night? Wine doesn’t object.

5. Wine doesn’t have a complicated past.

You’ll never have to worry about wine’s ex-girlfriend or boyfriend showing up to a party you’re attending. Wine only has eyes for you.

6. Wine will never ask you what is for breakfast, lunch or dinner.

You don’t have to slave over an amazing meal to impress wine. Wine doesn’t have any expectations when it comes to cuisine (thankfully).

7. You can share wine with your friends.

Who wants wine? Everybody. Everybody wants wine. There’s no need for jealousy in this relationship, just a box of Franzia.

8. Wine knows exactly how to calm you when you’re feeling anxious.

Pop open that bottle of Moscato and stay awhile, you’ll be feeling weightless in no time.

9. It’s not a bad thing when wine puts you to sleep.

“What were you saying? Sorry, I was dozing off.” Probably one of the worst things you could say to your significant other. But wine? Nope. Wine understands – and even helps carry you to your bed (or maybe the floor).

10. Wine can make you feel confident and invincible.

And it can also convince you that you belong on “The Voice” after singing Katy Perry on karaoke night.

11. Wine will never judge.

Wine has seen you cry on numerous occasions, including the time you hid under your desk and sobbed while having a quarter-life crisis, but it has never left your side.

12. Wine is always there for you.

Rough day at work? Wine. Speeding ticket? Wine. Your car broke down? Wine. It has your back in more ways than you can count.

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